Seven Kids, a Pandemic, and One Very Overdue Biopsy

[00:00:00] - [Speaker 0]
Name is Angie Helton. I'm a cancer survivor. And this is my podcast, Operate Cancer. Surviving cancer with sarcasm, sex talk, and zero filters, and a few f bombs along the way because, well, it's fucking cancer we're talking about. Welcome to the Après Cancer Podcast.

[00:00:24] - [Speaker 0]
Cheers.

[00:00:24] - [Speaker 1]
You. Cheers.

[00:00:25] - [Speaker 0]
This is exactly what the doctor did not order, but fuck it. We're talking about

[00:00:29] - [Speaker 1]
the insured.

[00:00:30] - [Speaker 0]
Thank you both for being here. Lee Goldberg, our local TV celebrity and a colleague of mine at some point At at one

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the early days.

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At the early days. And day. His lovely wife, Karen, thank you for being here.

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Thanks

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for having And, Lee, you're, like, a legend in Maine, but, you know, my podcast is gonna

[00:00:51] - [Speaker 1]
be worldwide. Obviously.

[00:00:52] - [Speaker 0]
So we're just gonna say that, you know, we know that you're really popular here, but not everyone might know you. But, anyway oh,

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we love

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you anyway. Thank you.

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They're about

[00:01:00] - [Speaker 0]
to. Yeah. So I wanna talk about your story and what happened with when you found out about the big c word and what was going on.

[00:01:10] - [Speaker 2]
Yeah. I was lucky, honestly, which is a weird word to use for cancer, but I was lucky because I went to the doctor every year for my physical and always get my blood drawn and never had any problems with anything and levels always come back green, green, green, green, green. And then one year I was looking at the results and one of them was yellow and I go, Oh, what's that? So I trace it back over and I say, PSA yellow. I go, What's PSA?

[00:01:42] - [Speaker 2]
Never heard of it. And so my doctor, who's retired now, said, That's prostate specific antigen so as you get little bit older I just throw that on to your labs because we need to keep an eye on it, make sure it stays below 4.0, you're at like a 3.2 so you're not there but let's just keep an eye on it, we'll just kind of recheck it. Okay, So six months later, I go back and it goes up. Six months later, I go back and it's going up again. And so I'm like, oh, I'll just I'll change my diet.

[00:02:09] - [Speaker 2]
You know? I'll you know? And he's like, yeah. It's it's not that. It's not a diet.

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It's not a diet. It's It's It's something. You're

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diet.

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Not supposed to have any kind of intercourse before you take your test because when you do the prostate is the gland that literally produces semen to make It's the only reason it's there is to procreate. So that will inherently raise your PSA level if you've just done that and then you go ahead and have your blood tested. So I'm like okay, got two weeks out, we are shutting her down.

[00:02:47] - [Speaker 1]
I'm like, it says four days.

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It does.

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It says four days. What do mean two weeks?

[00:02:51] - [Speaker 2]
I said, no. We're two weeks. No. Because this is because I'm

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telling not to do an open marriage kinda thing. Yeah. Right. Yeah.

[00:02:57] - [Speaker 2]
I know. I don't know.

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I was just Four days to Okay hun, whatever it takes.

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And did all the things that I thought would maybe help and it didn't. So I made a bet with my doctor. So this lasted over a year.

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Oh wow.

[00:03:11] - [Speaker 2]
And my doctor was very patient with me because I had no health history, any problems with myself, I have no family history anywhere of prostate cancer or anything like that. And I had no symptoms of any kind, so it was just bizarre to me that I might have something because I literally felt fine. Like nothing. You know, having to get up in the night frequently to pee. Nope.

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Trouble peeing. Nope. Not being able to stop peeing. Like you can't stop. Nope.

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Any discomfort anywhere. Nothing. No family or something like this. This must be a false thing. And it's absolutely possible to have elevated PSA and not have prostate cancer.

[00:03:47] - [Speaker 2]
So I'm like, that's probably what it is. So give me one more test, we'll do three months, if it goes up, I'll have a biopsy. The whole whole point of me delaying was I didn't want to have a biopsy. I had no history of a biopsy, never had one, don't even know anybody who had one, it just didn't sound like something I really wanted to do. So I was trying to avoid that.

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I have a very low pain threshold so I was like I just don't want to do that unless I have to do it. Give me three more months, if it doesn't go down we got a deal. Three months later it goes

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up. Gotta do the biopsy. Okay.

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Yeah. We'll do the biopsy.

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Yeah.

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Actually, that, I got referred to a urologist at this point once I agreed, got referred to a urologist, did not hit it off at all and know Larry went to the parking lot before I left the parking lot called my primary and said, hi. Nope. Not this guy. You got another one? And he's like, oh, what happened?

[00:04:46] - [Speaker 2]
I told him what happened. It just wasn't a good fit for me and so he referred me to another one and I'm telling you this because I think taking ownership of your medical care really matters. Whether it's asking questions or advocating for yourself or having someone to advocate for you like the bulldog over here.

[00:05:05] - [Speaker 1]
Yeah, I sent in a book.

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Have to do You that because if you just doctor says something, okay. You can't.

[00:05:12] - [Speaker 0]
Exactly. It's too important. I had a team that was with me every time to listen to what they were saying. So I would comprehend it. They would and they all heard different things.

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I don't know about you, but you hear different things when you you

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know? Absolutely.

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And you hear you take it in differently too. I think if you're the person who's the patient as well versus the support system. But anyway

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I was during COVID too.

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Yeah. I was during COVID, so she

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I couldn't go.

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Yeah. I had

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that I had to do it from

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the car.

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She would have to FaceTime in to the appointments so she could hear and I needed her to hear because she's first of all way better at medical stuff than I am and I wanted to be able to, here's what I heard, what did you hear and then kind of figure out where really in the middle was or tell me the stuff I didn't hear proper or whatever. So did get referred to a second urologist, went and had the biopsy and then they found that I had prostate cancer in a very small isolated area that was in there where it's going to be super easy to get rid of based on whichever treatment program I decided to pick.

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But they don't actually know that right away, they take 12 samples.

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Yeah, it was based on their first glimpse.

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Right. Based on first glimpse.

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So Looks like it hasn't spread, won't know until

[00:06:21] - [Speaker 1]
But won't know unless we remove the whole thing, and then we can see has it reached And the that was one of the things that I think really drew us staying in, like, getting his prostate removed versus doing radiation because you wanted it gone. You were like, I just want it out and gone. And for me that was like okay then we can actually make sure that they took all of it.

[00:06:46] - [Speaker 2]
Yeah, so and again with the whole point of delaying for me asking for so many PSA tests to avoid that biopsy, then I had the biopsy and it wasn't bad. I I won't do it again but it was much to do about nothing relatively speaking.

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It wasn't

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comfortable. I'm not we're not doing them at home. But it was uncomfortable. But it wasn't like, ah.

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But it wasn't as

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painful

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as I you thought

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any it side effects after it and I know people do so I feel very lucky that's not gonna be everybody's case. If I had known it wasn't gonna be as bad as I thought in my head it was gonna be, I probably would've done it earlier.

[00:07:27] - [Speaker 0]
Now what how did it how did you guys feel and how did you respond to hearing that big c word as I like to call it? Like, you finally find out that it's definitely that. And for me, I had to both times I had cancer, I had to go through three weeks of thinking it might be that. Yeah. And then three weeks of hell of tests, and you're still in your head going, who the hell do I tell?

[00:07:48] - [Speaker 0]
Who do I not tell? I don't even know if I've got it. But if I do, the fuck happens. And you're just freaked out. You don't even know where your head is at that point.

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Did you guys how did you guys react to that? Differently or

[00:07:57] - [Speaker 2]
we completely different. So Karen is obsessed with all of the possible outcomes of every situation. My brain doesn't do that. I will deal with whatever is known, no problem. I don't have time or effort or energy to deal with the unknown.

[00:08:14] - [Speaker 2]
That's hard. I know what happens to Fred in Alabama, that's not me. I don't know how I'm gonna react to this stuff. So I was very black and white. What is it and what can we do about it?

[00:08:25] - [Speaker 2]
Not what are all the possible things that could possibly go wrong and that's where she lived. So I think it was way worse for her in that regard as the person worrying about someone that you love that you can't do anything about which is an awful feeling. I feel the same way every time she's had a baby. I can't have babies, but I want to help her through this. I know she's in pain, I'm seeing it, I'm right there and I can't help it.

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It's an awful feeling

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and I

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feel like it must have been some equivalent of that except having a baby generally isn't life or death. Where she couldn't do anything so she was obsessed with gathering as much information as possible so once we did find out what the known was she already had the answer.

[00:09:02] - [Speaker 1]
Oh, wow. Mean, it was like a supercomputer.

[00:09:04] - [Speaker 2]
Yeah. Yeah. Like, she knew everything about every possible So we were she was ready.

[00:09:09] - [Speaker 0]
And she would just inform you when you

[00:09:11] - [Speaker 1]
needed to know.

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No space for it. And she knew that. He didn't want to know. Really don't.

[00:09:15] - [Speaker 1]
Yeah. He didn't wanna know any

[00:09:16] - [Speaker 2]
of it. And I yeah. And I'm still glad that that I did it that way. And I that's you know, we just work differently.

[00:09:21] - [Speaker 1]
So But that's a good part of how we work because I needed an outlet, and he didn't want like, that's where it was, like, I'm freaking out.

[00:09:30] - [Speaker 2]
Mhmm.

[00:09:30] - [Speaker 1]
He knee his method is, well, I have no answers yet, so I really can't go there. Mhmm. And I needed to take that time to then gather all of the information kinda like, you know, like, investigating, whatever. It it gave me an outlet to okay. If if it's this, here's how we can deal with it.

[00:09:50] - [Speaker 1]
If it's this, here's how people deal with it. If it's worst case scenario, here's what people do. All the way through, I mean, from, like, it's a false thing to you're gonna die. I had to work through all of that in order to and, I mean, we're parenting at that point six kids. So Seven

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kids. Wow.

[00:10:09] - [Speaker 1]
Seven kids. Poor which one? I'm sorry.

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Put a

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dollar in the

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therapy Because, oh, by the way, in the middle of all this COVID

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I'm pregnant also. So seven kids and I'm pregnant.

[00:10:21] - [Speaker 0]
Wow. Let go that.

[00:10:22] - [Speaker 2]
And we get that diagnosis. Which if you go in the way back machine, had I not been afraid of the biopsy, and had I had it done earlier when they first asked me to do it, we never would have gotten pregnant with Theo, we wouldn't have had our last

[00:10:36] - [Speaker 1]
And Theo is like the cherry on top of our life for all of us.

[00:10:39] - [Speaker 0]
Yeah. Wow. That's incredible. Crazy to think. Yeah.

[00:10:42] - [Speaker 2]
So

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And remind me okay. You might have just mentioned this a little bit before, but once you did figure out, what what did you decide to do? What was your option that you took? Because I know I know from my dad, frankly, way back when when all those guys my dad's age, when they got it, forget it, they were impotent of them. Done and done.

[00:11:00] - [Speaker 0]
Yeah. They take it and you're done. They had no choice, and it really sucks. But I don't know what you end up

[00:11:04] - [Speaker 2]
With choosing and how that prostate cancer it's such a unique one because it is a slower, probably the slowest growing cancer there is. Most of it. There's famous, if you will, line that you're more likely to die with prostate cancer than of prostate So cancer, I also at that point in my life I had never had a single sick day from work, not one. Wow. Almost at that point it was thirty years,

[00:11:31] - [Speaker 0]
was almost seven years,

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and I never called in sick. I'm like, how is this happening to me? Like I literally have nothing.

[00:11:38] - [Speaker 0]
Yeah.

[00:11:38] - [Speaker 2]
You know, and it's fine, it wasn't a woe is me thing, I'm just like I'm like the healthiest person, and then my urologist is like this literally has nothing to do your immune system either, like these are not connected in any way so you're not going to suddenly become the sick guy who catches everything, like it's a different type of cancer, it's very specific to that, and that's it. Okay, so I'm in his office and Karen's on the phone on FaceTime.

[00:12:02] - [Speaker 1]
Annoyed that I'm on the phone.

[00:12:03] - [Speaker 2]
And this is COVID.

[00:12:05] - [Speaker 1]
And pregnant so apparently.

[00:12:06] - [Speaker 2]
So it's masked so it's eyes only. So I've never seen my doctor's face

[00:12:11] - [Speaker 0]
he's never seen my face

[00:12:12] - [Speaker 2]
unless he watches Channel six. He's a urologist, not exactly the yuck yuck doctor. I mean he's maybe a yuck yuck doctor, he's sticking his hand up people on the head but not a yuck yuck doctor. So I'm like okay let's go over all this, what are my choices? And he's got a chart and he's got statistical, and I like that, I want math, I want statistical probabilities.

[00:12:35] - [Speaker 0]
Exactly.

[00:12:36] - [Speaker 2]
And he's like okay if you do this treatment here's your chance of you'll have some incontinence where you're going to end up, know, wearing a depends, you're going have problems with this, it could possibly come back, you know, here's all the different rates, okay, and then if you do this one, this and then we get to surgery was the last one, if you do this, this, I said okay, so what are the side effects? Well, you know, this, this, this, and for surgery he goes, so the side effects are, obviously because of your age, he's like, at that time I was 52, 51? Yeah. 51 or so, I think, so he said, because of your age, you're likely to not have any of these, Don't know. Or for a

[00:13:15] - [Speaker 0]
short time.

[00:13:15] - [Speaker 2]
Or yeah. Or or various

[00:13:16] - [Speaker 0]
And when you say any of this, you mean, like, would have been

[00:13:18] - [Speaker 1]
the impotence? So Okay.

[00:13:20] - [Speaker 2]
Like, incontinence where

[00:13:21] - [Speaker 1]
you Incontinence. Yeah.

[00:13:22] - [Speaker 0]
Where you have

[00:13:22] - [Speaker 1]
The stuff that you talked

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about with

[00:13:23] - [Speaker 1]
your dad.

[00:13:24] - [Speaker 0]
And the

[00:13:24] - [Speaker 1]
old school kind of this is what always happens? Okay.

[00:13:27] - [Speaker 2]
Yep. And And I know that that and then there was it wasn't off the table. It was just a lower percentage that it was gonna happen.

[00:13:33] - [Speaker 0]
Okay.

[00:13:33] - [Speaker 2]
So it was certainly something that could have absolutely happened, and we were ready for for all the things. And then, you know, he said, and and you won't be able to get Karen pregnant. I said time out. This is again, this is live, she's on the phone, he's

[00:13:47] - [Speaker 1]
with Face

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up, okay?

[00:13:48] - [Speaker 0]
Yeah, watching.

[00:13:49] - [Speaker 2]
And I said, I'm sorry, I said, with all due respect, I said, my wife is fourteen years younger than I am and I'm only 51 years old, I'd like to continue to have relationships with my wife. He's like, oh, I'm so sorry. You can have all the sex you want, you won't be able to get her pregnant. I said, doc, where the fuck have you been? Right?

[00:14:06] - [Speaker 2]
And I go like this to high five him.

[00:14:08] - [Speaker 0]
He's like mortified.

[00:14:10] - [Speaker 1]
This is like,

[00:14:10] - [Speaker 2]
oh my godly. Go She's screaming through the phone.

[00:14:13] - [Speaker 1]
I go, oh my godly.

[00:14:14] - [Speaker 2]
Like I go, this is not a side effect.

[00:14:16] - [Speaker 1]
This doctor like this. Because I was like

[00:14:19] - [Speaker 2]
Can we do it today? It's like another three kids ago.

[00:14:22] - [Speaker 1]
We abandoned this. Try to,

[00:14:24] - [Speaker 2]
have some fun with it. Right? And he's looking at me like, who is this psycho?

[00:14:27] - [Speaker 1]
Oh my god. And I'm looking at the doctor and agree with him. Like in my head, I'm like, oh, man. Oh, look. You do have some coping mechanisms.

[00:14:35] - [Speaker 1]
That's Awesome. Are you cute? So the silver lining.

[00:14:41] - [Speaker 0]
So ultimately That was it.

[00:14:43] - [Speaker 2]
For for me and just the way I work and this is not advice I will tell everybody, you must do this. I would never tell anybody what to do. It's very different for every person, every person depending on what their relationships are on their personal lives, their age, their physical condition, everything For me surgery made the most sense. She was already pregnant with our last child, our actual last child at that point, now I guess I won't be able to

[00:15:08] - [Speaker 1]
make them anymore.

[00:15:09] - [Speaker 2]
My recovery options were gonna be really good, the chances of it coming back were the best chances of it not coming back doesn't mean it can't, there's still a chance it can, but it was the highest level of probability that it wouldn't.

[00:15:22] - [Speaker 1]
And if it did, you could still do radiation.

[00:15:24] - [Speaker 2]
Yeah, if you did radiation and it didn't work, you can't have surgery.

[00:15:30] - [Speaker 0]
Yeah, if you did that first. Yeah, radiation radiation's a bit. So

[00:15:35] - [Speaker 2]
I just didn't want it constantly in my head that it might come back. And it's still in my head but it's not constantly And people who had their prostates removed do get prostate cancer again. And so I know it's not a zero percent chance, it's just a really small chance but every six months when I go to have my PSA check still five years out it's still in your head.

[00:16:01] - [Speaker 0]
Like, you're still like, what if

[00:16:03] - [Speaker 2]
this is the time? Five years out, six

[00:16:04] - [Speaker 0]
years out.

[00:16:05] - [Speaker 2]
It's gonna always be there. It's never going away. So it's constantly there.

[00:16:10] - [Speaker 0]
Yeah. I'm with you on that. I just went back down to Dana Farber for my six month. All good, but they don't have a test for what I had, the triple negative breast cancer. So they just kinda go by how you're feeling, which is a little scary too because you're like, why can't you do some blood work and figure this out?

[00:16:23] - [Speaker 0]
But I think they're getting there, but they don't have that. So it can be a little it just plays with your head when you get ready to do the mammogram to do the thing. Yeah.

[00:16:31] - [Speaker 2]
You know?

[00:16:31] - [Speaker 0]
Of course, I want 50% off on my mammogram now that I only have one boob. Right. They told me that's not like Not a thing? No.

[00:16:37] - [Speaker 2]
Come on,

[00:16:38] - [Speaker 0]
man. I know. Or something like that? No. Exactly.

[00:16:41] - [Speaker 0]
So how did, like, beyond getting it done, all the stuff, the recovery, life went on fine, sex life, marriage, all that stuff was great afterwards?

[00:16:51] - [Speaker 2]
I mean, I wouldn't say the marriage is great.

[00:16:57] - [Speaker 1]
How real do you wanna get?

[00:16:58] - [Speaker 2]
Yeah. No. I mean, it wasn't it wasn't instant, like, you know, day after surgery, hey, baby. Let's go. Like, no.

[00:17:06] - [Speaker 0]
I know. It's a long recovery.

[00:17:09] - [Speaker 2]
Everybody's different. And this one had a plan.

[00:17:13] - [Speaker 1]
I had a plan.

[00:17:13] - [Speaker 2]
I had done enough research to understand if we do this,

[00:17:18] - [Speaker 1]
here's what you're gonna have

[00:17:18] - [Speaker 2]
to This will get us to the finish line. It's gonna be crappy and it's gonna be uncomfortable.

[00:17:22] - [Speaker 0]
Oh wow, work it

[00:17:24] - [Speaker 2]
we have to do this to make sure that that when you're ready, we're actually ready.

[00:17:30] - [Speaker 0]
I'm like Yeah.

[00:17:31] - [Speaker 2]
Okay. So there was a lot of humbling stuff I never would have done myself. Why it's why, you know, I I wanted and was so gracious that you asked about Karen being here because I I don't get through this without her. I just don't. Mean, I couldn't have done any of the things that she did.

[00:17:53] - [Speaker 2]
Yeah. And I'm not someone who relies on people ever for her. Never had to, not looking forward to ever doing it again. Mhmm. But for that, like, you have to let go a little bit and you have to let someone help and and that's not something I did.

[00:18:06] - [Speaker 2]
I've never at that point over fifty years of life, not So a I'm the one that people come to, not the person that needs stuff.

[00:18:15] - [Speaker 0]
That's why

[00:18:15] - [Speaker 2]
I don't drink because of much, sorry.

[00:18:19] - [Speaker 0]
Just for today.

[00:18:20] - [Speaker 2]
Never I was always the designated driver. I was always the responsible one. Was always like, you guys need me, I got you. Like, you know, I was that one. I wasn't the one

[00:18:26] - [Speaker 0]
who needed it.

[00:18:26] - [Speaker 2]
Yeah. So that was really humbling and and then as a man, it was just like felt like I was letting her down and disappointing her and, like, that I couldn't but she got a bad lot because here's a husband who's broken, and that's all the stuff that goes to your head. And, you know, it's just it's hard. Yeah. It's a hard place to be.

[00:18:48] - [Speaker 0]
But it sounds like with Karen's help and everything too that you guys came to a really cool place and that you decided to do something really positive with the experience that happened for others. Right? So I'd love to hear more about that. I got on the website. I think it's awesome.

[00:19:04] - [Speaker 0]
Yeah.

[00:19:05] - [Speaker 2]
Yeah. So that urologist who I high fived about Yeah. About not having that as a side effect, and his wife Katie, and my and my urologist named Steven, doctor Steven Ryan, are this day currently like our closest friends. Oh nice, And just kinda happened, it wasn't planned, and we just, you know, through time and conversations, and we had a dinner, and it was like wow, these

[00:19:32] - [Speaker 1]
are great. Our kids love each other.

[00:19:33] - [Speaker 0]
Oh my gosh, awesome.

[00:19:34] - [Speaker 2]
Great people. So yeah, so then I'm like okay well if this happened and I have to give credit, 100% I have to give credit to Channel six because I like I feel like I wanna talk about this. And I said, we're going to start a foundation for prostate cancer awareness because if my doctor had not just randomly without even asking me put that test on my chart, I'd still have it, I wouldn't even know, So how many other people out there is that gonna happen to, and how many men don't go to the doctor until something hurts, and then they're probably still waiting, it's gonna go away. And I have so many people over last five years that have reached out that have had awful stories of their brother, father, uncle, you know, that just waited so long because by the time they found it it was too late. So there has to be a reason this happened to me.

[00:20:26] - [Speaker 2]
So I went to the channel and said hey we're gonna start a foundation and I just wanted you to know I'm gonna be starting out, it's gonna be a website and because of name, image and likeness and the way that local television wants to control all of their people I just want them to know. Yep. And they said, Do you want to talk about it on TV? I said, What? You can talk about whatever you want.

[00:20:46] - [Speaker 2]
Whenever you want to talk about it, you want to promote whatever events you guys have going on, whatever you want to do, talk about it as much as you want, whenever you want, do whatever you want, you have our 100% full blasting. I was like wow. Awesome. That's so cool. And what's it called?

[00:20:59] - [Speaker 2]
Prostatecancermain.org. Because men's health isn't something that's really talked about. Men talk about it.

[00:21:09] - [Speaker 0]
In that

[00:21:09] - [Speaker 1]
area. The sex life that we can never talk about. Right. And so I went online because we didn't wanna know anything. I went online as an alternative person.

[00:21:22] - [Speaker 1]
One, because I didn't want, at that point, any of our private information out there. And two, I really wanted to see what the guys were really saying and what they really needed help with. This is when we first got diagnosed. You

[00:21:36] - [Speaker 2]
created a persona as a man though right?

[00:21:39] - [Speaker 1]
Yes I

[00:21:39] - [Speaker 2]
did. Yeah. Well no because That's

[00:21:41] - [Speaker 0]
great though.

[00:21:42] - [Speaker 1]
I didn't say I even had it. I just went in with a male name.

[00:21:49] - [Speaker 0]
Just to listen to the spores

[00:21:51] - [Speaker 1]
and stuff. Yeah. Because I didn't want I wanted to know what are they really struggling with that they that I don't want him to have to struggle with. Right. And what can I learn from them in, like, an undercover way to and this was, again, my own coping mechanism?

[00:22:08] - [Speaker 1]
I just I needed a job to do.

[00:22:10] - [Speaker 0]
Yeah.

[00:22:10] - [Speaker 1]
And what can I do to if he doesn't wanna hear about it, I need to and he's not maybe gonna tell me everything? I need to know what are all you know, what are what do they struggle with after? And what do they wish they had during it? And what, you know, what kind of things can I do to even make it easier for him, for us, and for anyone else? What can I figure out?

[00:22:32] - [Speaker 1]
What can I do to fix something? Because I feel like, you know, you have to fix something. And that's where I went in and just tried to figure out what, you know, what will make it what do they don't wanna talk about?

[00:22:43] - [Speaker 0]
Yeah. I'm curious. Was there anything that surprised you about what they were concerned about? Like, I get it. You know, cancer, of course, you're concerned about death or whatever.

[00:22:50] - [Speaker 0]
But, like, what what is it that they're

[00:22:52] - [Speaker 1]
Far more concerned about never being able to have an erection or have sex again. That's their number one thing. Right. Because I think that we

[00:23:00] - [Speaker 2]
More than death, would guess.

[00:23:01] - [Speaker 1]
A 100%. No.

[00:23:02] - [Speaker 2]
Not gonna lie. I can't do that, what's the point of being alive?

[00:23:05] - [Speaker 1]
That is a 100%. They became Right. Many of them were actually on the verge of not wanting to live anymore. One, they either didn't have someone to help them through it. Two, they had no idea what to do because their doctor never informed them that, oh, hey, you might not be able to have sex or what can you do to prevent Yeah.

[00:23:23] - [Speaker 1]
You know, anything.

[00:23:25] - [Speaker 2]
Let's get through that light bill. The ghosts

[00:23:26] - [Speaker 0]
are here.

[00:23:26] - [Speaker 1]
That's the ghost. The sex ghosts

[00:23:28] - [Speaker 0]
are the sex ghosts. Oh my god, they just shut

[00:23:30] - [Speaker 1]
it out. Here's the incontinence

[00:23:32] - [Speaker 0]
So and what's your goal with prostate cancer mean? What do you want it to do, be?

[00:23:38] - [Speaker 2]
I want to raise awareness and to talk about it because it's not talked about and it's, you know a PSA test is a test that's done on a vial of blood that they already have from you if you go to the doctor, and I understand that not everybody goes to the doctor every year, but if you do and they have a vial of your blood to test for cholesterol or blood pressure or whatever else they're tested for, they can run one more test on that same vial of blood, so it's no work. So I want to raise awareness of why you should have a PSA test done, absolutely mandatory. If you have family history, for me, and Doctor. Ryan might have different answers, I think it should be at 40. If you don't have any family history, absolutely no later than 50.

[00:24:22] - [Speaker 2]
And so in the five years that our foundation has been up and running, we've seen some change and I'm not sitting here trying to tell you this because of us, but we do have a loud microphone, I have a big voice and a big mouth.

[00:24:34] - [Speaker 1]
Yes you do.

[00:24:36] - [Speaker 2]
And a platform that the station lets me use to just get it out there and every six months I talk about it. Every time I go get my PSA test myself, I post my results and I talk about it. It's an opportunity to talk about it. We've had, Maine Health has changed its protocol and it's now on the official questionnaire when you turn 50 years old that the doctor has to present to you the option to have a PSA test if you'd like. Doctors have been pushing back against this because of reasons we don't have time to get into.

[00:25:07] - [Speaker 2]
But the fact that that's now there, that is huge. It will at least give the patient the right to say yes or no instead of not even having an option.

[00:25:14] - [Speaker 1]
Information is power.

[00:25:15] - [Speaker 2]
It's huge. Then legislation was passed in April '26 that insurance companies in Maine have to pay for any copay on any test on PSA tests. It costs

[00:25:30] - [Speaker 0]
you no money. That's awesome. So

[00:25:31] - [Speaker 2]
there's literally no reason to not get this And so we hold events, we raise a little bit money, I don't care about the money, we appreciate it and we use it to try to do more and raise awareness we're gonna keep doing that. I really just want the platform to just keep talking about it and get people tested as much as possible.

[00:25:51] - [Speaker 0]
I'm thinking prostate cancer in The US might be your next move. Maybe get legislation passed in I'm different

[00:25:57] - [Speaker 1]
just saying. It would be amazing.

[00:25:58] - [Speaker 2]
I've said this a thousand times, when you go to the doctor, they work for you. So if you have a doctor that says I want to give a PSA test, you're too young or you don't need it or whatever, that's not an acceptable answer. You tell your doctor that you want the PSA test and that's it, period. We're not asking, this isn't a conversation. I want the PSA test and if that doctor won't give it to you then you get another doctor.

[00:26:24] - [Speaker 2]
Or make them sign something saying

[00:26:27] - [Speaker 0]
I didn't want to give you the test?

[00:26:28] - [Speaker 2]
I asked my doctor for the PSA test, he said no. Guess what's gonna happen at that point? He's gonna give me the test.

[00:26:34] - [Speaker 0]
Right? You do have to I mean, you know, in school now you have to advocate And you should have

[00:26:38] - [Speaker 2]
to, but it's okay.

[00:26:39] - [Speaker 0]
But that's the way it is.

[00:26:39] - [Speaker 2]
But you have to. So instead of waiting for that to change, take control of yourself.

[00:26:44] - [Speaker 0]
Right. Right. And I wanna give Karen a chance because she was saying she wanted to blow on how great you are. So I'm gonna give her the chance to do that, which I think is awesome. No.

[00:26:53] - [Speaker 0]
Oh my god. Your head's gonna be so damn big.

[00:26:55] - [Speaker 1]
I'm get some Yeah. What am I gonna I wanna give I gotta raise this right so I don't have to

[00:26:59] - [Speaker 0]
hear about it first time. I'm not kidding.

[00:27:01] - [Speaker 2]
Am I gonna copy this?

[00:27:03] - [Speaker 1]
Yeah. No. Oh, yeah. Just delete it after. No.

[00:27:05] - [Speaker 1]
I'm kidding. The day that he went public, I have friends that work at various medical facilities. I'm not even gonna name them, but they said the number of calls they got from men and women calling for their partner, dad, whoever, to get their PSA tested was out of control in a good way. Hundreds.

[00:27:27] - [Speaker 0]
Oh, that's awesome. The hook. That is

[00:27:29] - [Speaker 1]
so To the point where finally they were like, saw Lee Goldberg this morning. Right? Like, it was so and that for me was I'm not gonna say worth it, but it was pretty close to at that point, I knew he was okay. We were focused on bringing awareness to other people and trying to make if they do, god forbid, have it, the road a little bit easier Yeah. For everybody in the family.

[00:27:53] - [Speaker 1]
But to hear that people it worked. You went out. You went public. I didn't wanna go public. I was like, if we don't talk about it, it's not there.

[00:28:01] - [Speaker 0]
Coping mechanism.

[00:28:02] - [Speaker 1]
But immediately, when we did and I heard that, it was worth it.

[00:28:08] - [Speaker 2]
A gentleman from Canada reached out to me because he searched hashtag on Instagram, found, somehow came across my account and saw the post on prostate cancer, messaged me by himself, not married, didn't have much of a support staff, didn't know if I would be willing to talk with him, so I called him and we talked on the phone, and he's still in touch

[00:28:26] - [Speaker 0]
with him

[00:28:26] - [Speaker 2]
to this Oh day and used to

[00:28:27] - [Speaker 0]
have yeah, a that's so awesome.

[00:28:28] - [Speaker 2]
I had a gentleman from Alaska who has family here but he lives in Alaska, come across my story, went and got tested in Alaska, found out he had an elevated PSA, had prostate surgery, had it removed, and his wife said, You go fly to Maine right now, and I want you to go see him in person and I want you to thank him. He's like, Can

[00:28:49] - [Speaker 0]
I go?

[00:28:50] - [Speaker 1]
Those are just two of a ton of stories.

[00:28:51] - [Speaker 2]
How cool is that? And we chatted and his wife came and she said, I just wanna give you a hug. I should've thought I would give you a hug. I'm like, come on.

[00:28:58] - [Speaker 0]
I'd give you a hug if I could stand up in his face right now, but I can't. But I'm gonna say cheers to you guys.

[00:29:04] - [Speaker 1]
Is awesome. For bringing awareness and doing this.

[00:29:07] - [Speaker 0]
You. And I'll just say to everyone, just check with your doctor about all stuff. Right? Just a little disclaimer, but, like Yeah.

[00:29:13] - [Speaker 1]
Advocate for yourself. No.

[00:29:15] - [Speaker 0]
We always say that. But we've

[00:29:16] - [Speaker 1]
learned a lot. But you do.

[00:29:18] - [Speaker 0]
You have to educated once you go through it all.

[00:29:19] - [Speaker 2]
You just have to advocate for yourself, whatever it is. Especially with medical, no matter what, they tell you, you know your body better than anybody else. That's right. The questions, demand the answers, it's not optional. We're not saying how do you feel, this isn't how you feel, this is what we're doing.

[00:29:37] - [Speaker 1]
Our healthcare system, it only goes so far, we only have, we're as good as it will let us be, so you always have to take it. If something doesn't feel right, don't put it aside. And if you have a partner or you hear your dad say it, push them to do it or help them out. Because you could save their life. You really could.

[00:30:01] - [Speaker 1]
Because the difference with prostate cancer, like you said, you sometimes don't feel it until it's too late. Yes. Yeah. And that's where I hear the stories that absolutely break my heart.

[00:30:13] - [Speaker 0]
Well, thank you both for coming on. I really, really Thank you. I'm honored that you told me your story this way, and maybe we can get it out even further to other states. And like I said, prostate cancer US. Let's go.

[00:30:24] - [Speaker 0]
Love it. Cheers.

[00:30:24] - [Speaker 2]
Après cancer US.

[00:30:26] - [Speaker 0]
Yeah. Yes.

[00:30:27] - [Speaker 1]
Worldwide. Worldwide. Worldwide. Worldwide. Worldwide.

[00:30:29] - [Speaker 1]
Forget Worldwide. Worldwide. The US. Take it out. Love you guys.